Wedding In Las Vegas
by seuss fan
Summary: Roger and Mimi are getting married. The couple has decided to celebrate their nuptials in Vegas. What could possibly go wrong?
1. Chapter 1

Wedding in Las Vegas

By: Seuss Fan

(No copyright infringement intended. Please review. If you like this check out my other stories on my profile.)

Chapter 1: There's something I should have told you when I looked into your eyes….

Roger stood in his apartment, casually staring out the window as he turned the ring around and around in his fingers. He wanted to do this. He didn't know why exactly. The word marriage had never appealed to him before. But in the short time he had spent with Mimi he had realized how important such a practice was. If she would've wound up in the hospital he wouldn't have been able to visit her. That right there was his biggest concern. Since her near death experience Mimi had starting getting help for her habit. However, the fact that he might lose the greatest thing that had ever happened to him was always in the back of Roger's mind. If Mimi said no he'd understand. Being a married woman didn't seem to fit in with the profile of a stripper. But that wouldn't discourage Roger from trying. After all the ring cost a fortunate. He had to put it to good use.

"You wanted to see me?"

"Like I have to ask permission to speak to my own roommate."

"So, what's so important that you have to take me away from my latest project?"

"No offense, but I think the world of clay animation is safer without you."  
"I'm giving it a shot okay? Probably won't stick with it but I thought I'd experiment. So, what did you wanna talk about?"

"This."

"You steal that from somewhere?"

"When have you known me to steal?"

"Sorry, just the first thought that came to my head. Whose it for and where'd you get it?"

"I bought it and it's for Mimi."

"How could you afford something like that?"

"The ATM."

"Oh, yeah. Memory lapse. Wait, did you say that was for Mimi?"

"Uh-huh."

"Are you going to propose to her?"

"Yep."

"Are you feeling okay?"

"That's your first question?"

"I just never thought you'd wanna get married."  
"Neither did I. But every day when I wake up and see Mimi lying next to me I think that I'm lucky to have her alive. And if God forbid something happened to her I wouldn't be legally allowed to plan her funeral."

"I don't think that's against the law."

"Whatever. The point is I want the world to know that I'm her and she's mine. I want this to be official."

"Where were you planning on having this wedding?"

"I was gonna suggest going to Vegas."

"Throw that into the proposal and she might go for it."

"Actually I had a different idea for my proposal."

"How're you going to do it?"

"My plan involves you."

"Me? This is your proposal. You do it yourself."

"Some roommate you are. I just want you to help with one thing."

"What?"

"Here I have it written down."

"Wow, you made a chart. This must be elaborate."

"Why are you so snippy today?"

"I'm blaming it on the animation."

"Sounds like a good reason to me."

"Alright I'll stop doing it. What's the plan?"

The trap was set. All the guys had to do was wait for Mimi to come home and their plan would be under way. Mimi had worked the afternoon shift at the Cat Scratch Club and was home by five o'clock. Normally at this time the guys would be figuring out something they could do for dinner. But when Mimi opened the door there was no one to be found.

"Maybe they're getting take out." she mumbled to herself as she got a drink of water.

Minutes passed but no sign of Roger or Mark.

"This is weird." whispered Mimi as she reached for the phone. She didn't necessarily know who she was going to call but she had to o something. Neither of the guys really had a job. And if they had gone to visit someone or do an errand they would have left a note. Just as Mimi had started to dial Maureen and Joanne roger and Mark burst through the door carrying reels of recently processed film.

"Good. You're home early."

"It's good to see you too, babe. Where the hell have you guys been?"

"Well, Mom we just had to do something real quick."

"What's his deal?"

"Clay animation has turned him into a permanent wise-ass."

"Gotcha. So, what's up?"

"I'm gonna get something to eat. Catch you guys later."

"But you just got in!"

"I know but I kinda feel like a restaurant tonight. Later."

"Has clay animation also turned his taste buds against eating with his friends?"

"Not exactly. Look, before we eat there's something I wanna show you."

"Okay."

"Let me just fiddle with the projector here. Ah, there we go."

Pictures of Roger and Mimi began to flicker upon the wall. Good times and bad times flew past Mimi's eyes. As she started to tear up Roger turned off the film. He sat down beside her on the couch and pulled her face towards his.

"What was that all about?"

"Mimi, there's something I wanna ask you."

"Okay."

"As you know we've been through a lot together. Probably more than most couples. And no matter what's happened we've always been able to work it out."

"So, what's your question?"

"Just let me finish."

"You look nervous."

"Mimi."  
"Sorry. Continue, please."

"As I was saying we've always been able to make things work. And even though I'd be happy living the way we are now I'd like a little bit more. So, Mimi Marquez, will you marry me?"

Mimi sat on the couch completely dumbfounded. Her boyfriend was asking her to marry him. Marry him? Was he sure about this? She knew she needed to say something before his knee fell asleep but she just couldn't get her mouth to form words.

"Well? Will you?"

"I'm just shocked that's all."

"Do you need some time to think about?"

"I think so."

"That's fine. After dinner you wanna sit and talk?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. I'll go heat something up. You can hold on to this for now."

Roger handed Mimi the ring then went to fetch something out of the gang's makeshift fridge. As Roger attempted to thaw two day old pasta Mimi sat, twirling the one karat diamond ring in her right hand thinking about what her future was going to be like.

"So?"

"It sounds like a good idea."

"But?"

"But this just isn't me, babe. I'm not the marrying type. I'm all for falling in love and living together. I don't have to tell you that. But settling down and getting married just isn't for me."

"If we got married we wouldn't have to change our lifestyle. Everything would still be the same. The only difference would be that we'd both have rings on our fingers."

"Don't you understand from watching your own parents? Everything changes once you get married."

"Only if you let it. We get each other. We have a good thing going on here…"

"So let's not ruin it. I appreciate the offer but I'm going to have to say no. You okay?"

"It stings a little but I'll get over it. Guess now I gotta head back to Tiffany's."

"You got the ring from Tiffany's?"

"Yeah."

"Are you insane? The pawn shop across the street has better looking stuff than that for half the price!"

"Probably isn't real."

"Who cares if it's real? What does a girl like me, living in a place like this need with a real diamond ring?"

"First, you reject my proposal and then you criticize my desire to buy you something nice for a change?"

"But we live like pigs. And better yet we're comfortable living like pigs. Why would you think that I'd enjoy receiving a diamond that cost as much or more than my AZT?"

"Because you're the love of my life and you deserve better than this. I like the way we live and I know you like it too. But we have the ATM now. We have the ability to go out and do something crazy every now and then. Be anti-Bohemian every once in a while. We don't have to always live as if we're against the man. We've outsmarted the man. So let's enjoy it."

"You really wanna get married?"

"Would you like me to explain my reasoning?"

"If you please."

"Before we got back together you almost died. If you had gone into cardiac arrest and the ambulance company wouldn't have put us on hold you would have ended up in the intensive care unit. And throughout your stay the only person who could approve medication or procedures would be your mother. Who, like I have to tell you can't speak English. Me, Mark, Maureen, Collins, and Joanne wouldn't be able to do anything. Even though we feel like your family we're not. You know how long it would've taken to get things done? You're condition probably would've gotten worse while the hospital staff would be racing around trying to locate a translator."

"But nothing happened."

"But what if it did? And something still could go wrong."

"I'm not on drugs anymore."

"It's not just the drugs I'm talking about. We're both infected, babe. If either one of us gets sick ,our parents, who live miles away from New York, are the ones who would be calling the shots. We couldn't even stay over in each other's hospital rooms. We could only come during visiting hours because we're technically single."

"So, this is just a marriage of convenience."

"No it's not."

"Sounds like it is."

"Mimi…"

"It sounds like you just wanna marry me on the off chance that I might get cancer and have to be hospitalized for it because my immune system has turned to shit!"

"That's not what I'm saying. Seeing you almost die in front of me made me realize that you're more important to me than anything else in the world. It's not enough that I know that and that all of our friends know it too. I want the world to know it. The whole hospital idea may have put me on this thought path but I've stayed on it for many more reasons. I want this to be official. I want you to be my wife."

"Can I change my answer?"

"Are you serious?"

"Did I stutter?"

"I can't believe this."

"Now get down on your knee and put that ring on my finger."

"Why do I have to get back on my knee?"

"Don't question your future wife. Just do it."

Roger did as he was told. After the ring was safely put in its proper place Roger pulled Mimi into a clichéd, but passionate kiss.

The next day Roger and Mimi gathered their friends together to reveal their news.

"Who died?"

"Someone died?"

"We didn't call you over here because someone died."

"I know the reason why."

"Mark, blab and I will kill you."

"Fine."

"We called you over here because we have some really great news to tell you."

"Out with it already!"

"Show them Mimi."

"Is that an engagement ring?"

"We're getting married!"

Instead of the applause and excitement Roger and Mimi expected they were met with blank stares. Well, from everyone besides Mark.

"You're what?"

"Look, we know this seems weird coming from us but we had a long talk last night and it seems like a really good option."

"I'm in support of it."

"Thanks, Collins."

"I support it, too. Congrats you guys!"

"Thanks, Maureen."

"I'll show my support when the shock wears off."

"Alright now since everyone's on board we'd like to give you our wedding invitations."  
"You set a date already? That was fast."

"Well, it all really depends on when we get there."

"Huh?"

"Open up your envelopes."

"A map?"

"Look at where it's circled."

"Nevada?"

"Look closer."

"Oh my gosh! I love you guys!"

"Pack your bags everybody! We're taking a road trip to Vegas!"


	2. Chapter 2

Wedding in Las Vegas

By: Seuss Fan

(No copyright infringement intended. Please review. If you like this check out my other stories on my profile.)

Chapter 2: Leave this to the roaches and mice….

Roger and Collins bought a van from a used car lot. Joanne stocked up on what she referred to as "road trip supplies" while Maureen went from boutique to boutique searching for Mimi's wedding dress. Mark stepped away from his clay animation long enough to get his equipment in order. After all, someone needed to film the big day. Once every one was settled and packed and all the appropriate materials were acquired the gang was ready to hit the road.

"Roger, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why, did we each get a map if you and Mark are the head navigators?"

"Well, Maureen in case someone gets shit faced one of you guys can pick up the slack."

"What if we all get shit-faced?"

"Then we'll be stranded for the night."

"Alright I got all the food and suitcases crammed into the trunk. Unfortunately some of the toiletries wouldn't fit."

"You mean the case that contains my favorite body wash?"

"Maureen doesn't start with me!"

"Joanne you know that stuff is hard I find!  
"They are a million connivance stores. One of them is bound to have it."

"I doubt it."

"Guys, please calm down. It's too early for an argument!"

"Shut up, Mark!"

"We better get to Vegas quick. Those two in a car for more than a day and I might shoot one of them."

"Cameras don't contain bullets dude."

"Once again, it's too early for his shit."

"Hey, baby."

"Hello, Mrs. Davis."

"I'm liking the sound of that."

"I glad you are."

"It's too early for lovebirds, too."

"Mark, what crawled up your butt?"

"I'm just tired."

"Right, tired. Good excuse."

"It's not an excuse Collins. It's the truth."

"Whatever. Hey, Roger."

"Mmm….yeah?"

"Who's driving first?"

"I'll do first shift, then Mark and you can take the night."

"Sounds good. Everybody ready?"

"Maureen, you have my dress?"

"It's packed up in my suitcase; neat and folded."

"Alright, Collins. We're good."

"Then let's get in the van and get the fuck outta here!"

The Bohemians piled into the gigantic red van and drove away from Avenue A and onto a highway filled with adventure.

The gang made their first stop in Cleveland, Ohio. The hotel they found wasn't the greatest but compared to living on Avenue A, it was paradise.

"Sleep!"

"I agree with Maureen. It's impossible to sleep in that van."

"Sorry, it was the only one that would fit all of us and our luggage."

"Can I get some help here?" Mark begged as he balanced numerous suitcases.

"Oh, sorry man."

"Thanks."  
"Where are Roger and Mimi?"

"They found a McDonalds so they were gonna pick up food."

"I packed ac shit ton of food!"

"No, Joanne you packed snacks. We need real food."

"Well, excuse me."

"What do we do till they get back?"

"Unpack our stuff?"

"Right."  
"How long are we here for?"

"Maybe just for the night."

"They why did you bring all our stuff in here?"

"Don't you wanna change your clothes in the morning?"

"Sorry, I can't think when I'm low on sleep."

"I know the feeling. Collins, you okay?"

"I was just thinking that Angel would have really liked to see this."

"She's watching us from heaven, man."

"I know, I know."

"Food delivery!"

"Make sure you close and lock the door."

"You got the key Mark?"

"It's right on the table."

"What'd you get?"

"A quarter pounder for each of us, two large fries, and two large Cokes."

"Only two drinks?"

"We need to save money for Vegas."

"I don't think Maureen's gonna eat her burger."

"Why?"

"Just look at her, she's out like a light."

"I'll take hers."

"Knock yourself out."

"When you wanna head out tomorrow, Rog?"

"Whenever we all wake up."

"It's not like there's a deadline. Whenever we get to Vegas, we get there."

"Can we make some stops along the way?"

"I guess. Where'd you wanna go Joanne?"

"I don't know. I was looking at the map and there's some cool places listed."

"What? Like the world's largest ball of twine or something like that?"

"Mark!"

"Shush! You'll wake up Maureen."

"Sorry."

"I'm just kidding. We can do whatever you want on this trip."

"It's in lieu of having a wedding reception."

"This is probably gonna be one of the most memorable things we do in our lives."

"I hope so."

"I propose a toast. To Mimi and Roger; May they live long and grab life by the balls!"

"Here, here!"

The Bohos continued to eat and talk long into the early morning hours.

The gang continued to make their way towards Vegas. They spent their days driving and their nights crashing in cheap motels. Midway through their trip however, they decided to stop and honor Joanne's tourism request.

"What are we doing in Wichita, Kansas?"

"Blame it on your girlfriend."

"The map says that there's cool stuff to do here."

"Like what? It's Kansas! The only thing this state is good for is providing a setting for the beginning of the Wizard of Oz."

"Just trust me."  
"Fine."

"So, where to Joanne?"

"The Wichita Gardens."

"We're going to be looking at flowers?"

"Well, since we've been cooped up in New York since forever with all its pollution and tall gray buildings I thought it would be nice to enjoy some nature."

"I think that's a great idea, Joanne."

"Thank you Collins."

"Yeah, it sounds pretty romantic."

"Yuck."

"Mark!"

"Sorry."

"Alright to the Wichita Gardens it is!"

"I just got attacked by a mosquito, FYI." Maureen shouted as the group made their way through the gardens.

"Guilt will not work on me.", Joanne replied.

"A girl can try."

"Oh, look roses! I just wish I could steal them."

"Why?"

"So, I could use them for my bouquet."

"I thought we eloped so we wouldn't have to turn our wedding into a production that included such things as bouquets."

"But every girl has a bouquet."

"Since when did you care about what other girls have?"

"Can't I live a part of the fairytale?"

"I have a Leatherman on me."

"Thanks, Collins."

"Anytime."

"Where are we gonna stay in Vegas?"

"We'll find out when we get there Mark."

"I was just curious."

"Can we get married at the Little White Wedding Chapel?"

"Why?"

"It's supposed to be really famous."

"What happened to that fiery, I only participate in mainstream stuff once in awhile girl I fell in love with?"

"I'm still here."

"Alright, I'll believe you."

"Mimi, I found the perfect daises for the bridesmaids!" Maureen shouted.

Mimi ran off in the direction Maureen had called while the rest stayed behind.

"She's been acting so weird."

"Weddings do that to people. Especially women."

"I know, Mark. I hope that's all this is."

"You having second thoughts?" inquired Joanne.

"Not exactly. I just don't wanna spend the rest of my life with that. I want the girl who harassed me before saying yes."

"She'll come around. She's just distracted. Like Mark said."

"I hope you're right." responded Roger as he looked off into the distance at his future bride.

Two days later the gang arrived in Vegas. However, since they got in at two o'clock in the morning heir entrance was not as impressive as it should have been.

"Vegas, is just as gorgeous as I always imagined."

"Roger, can you shut up and find a hotel please?"

"Geez, Maureen you don't have to be so snippy."

"I think I speak for everyone when I say we are tired, cramped, and are in need of a bed pronto!"

"I second that idea!"

"Okay, I'm looking for a place to pull in.", Roger retorted back. He continued o drive down the strip until he found the Motel 6 Tropicana Hotel. As Roger was busy checking in the rest of the party unloaded the van and shoved their luggage into the two rooms Roger had purchased; one for the girls and one for the guys. Roger soon rejoined the group but not before making a very important phone call.

"Hello, is this the Little White Wedding Chapel?"

"Why yes it is. What can I do for you, Sir?" the voice replied on the other line.

"I'd like to make reservations for your main chapel."

"When we would you like those reservations, Sir?"

"This coming Friday. Do you have any openings?"

"Indeed we do. We have an eight o'clock and a ten fifteen. Both at night."

"Eight o'clock sounds great."

"Are you interested in one of our specialty packages?"

"No, just the standard is fine."

"When would you like the limousine to arrive, Sir?"

"Seven sounds alright."

"Thank you, Sir. Can I just get your name and the name of your bride?"

"Roger Davis and Mimi Marquez."

"And the address of your hotel?"

"195 East Tropicana Avenue."

"Well, Roger you have a pleasant evening and congratulations."

"Thanks very much."

After hanging up, Roger looked up at the brilliant Las Vegas skyline.

"Just a few more days," he whispered to himself, "and then she'll be mine."


	3. Chapter 3

Wedding in Las Vegas

By: Seuss Fan

(No copyright infringement intended. Please review. If you like this check out my other stories on my profile. I'm sorry this update took so long. This past year was extremely hectic for me. I hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me.)

Chapter 3: You made the lock on my heart explode…

Two days before the big day the gang decided to enjoy all of what Vegas had to offer, bachelor/bachelorette party style.

"Which clubs are you boys hitting up?" Mimi asked as she finished primping.

"Well, we were thinking about taking in a show first."

"Huh?"

"Yeah, it's called G-strings and Pasties." Maureen chimed in as she preceded to rummage through the guys' belongings.

"Maureen, that was private!" Roger yelled as he tried to snatch the flyer back from Maureen.

"Baby, I don't care what you do. I work as a stripper. Do you realize how many bachelor parties I service on a weekly basis? It honestly doesn't bother me if you see a peep show tonight."

"I know. I don't know what I was thinking."

"I personally think you're letting your wedding jitters get to your head."

"Baby, are you getting cold feet?"

"Thanks, Collins. Look, I'm fine, okay? You girls go and finish getting ready in your room and have a good time tonight."

"You sure there's nothing you want to talk about?"

"Not right now. Don't want to spoil your night."

"The only thing that will spoil my night is knowing that there's something bothering you."

"You know I haven't had the best track record regarding expressing my feelings and talking about my problems."

"That doesn't mean you can't at least try."

"Look, Mimi we can talk later alright. Now go and celebrate your last few days of freedom, for my sake."

"Fine. But we're definitely talking later."

"That's okay with me."

"So, what's this about your wedding anxiety?" questioned Mark as the girls left the room.

"Not you too!"

"Dude, aside from Collins I'm your best friend. I should know about these things first."

"Well, if you want to get technical Mimi is my best friend but that's beside the point."

"Whatever. You gonna tell me what's been bothering you?"

"No."

"Well, if you told Collins why can't you tell me?"

"Because he found out by accident."

"I caught him writing a song about his nerves by the pool yesterday."

"It started out as a wedding present for Mimi but it slowly turned into a pseudo rant."

"You having second thoughts?"

"No, just a little bit of nerves."

"Why couldn't you tell me that?"

"Because you guys might make a big deal out of it."  
Dude, you've known us for years. We wouldn't do that."

"And neither would Mimi."

"I know. I just didn't want anyone to worry. If I start going around telling you guys about my worries all you'll think about is, 'Poor Roger, he really needs our sympathy right now.', instead of having fun. It's not like I'm scared of walking down the aisle. I'm just getting a little jittery. And from my limited understanding of weddings this is how most grooms tend to feel as the big day approaches. Now, before I really start to feel like I'm on a talk show can we please go see some strippers?"

"Roger's right. After all, we're in Vegas baby!"

"And he's not even drunk yet. This should be interesting."

As the boys left their hotel room Collins had no idea how true his last statement would become.

The girls had a somewhat typical evening. They went club hopping, went to a drag queen strip club, and visited every bar on the Vegas strip. Even Joanne was smiling by the end of the night. But the boys on the other hand had a much crazier night.

"Hey, Mark you like the show?"

"Yeah, what's not to like?"

"That's not what Roger's getting at."

"What do you mean?"

"I think one of the dancers was checking you out."

"Dude, that's a 200 seat theater. There could have been plenty of guys that she could have been staring at."

"We were sitting in the second row. That doesn't leave her many options."

"She could have been looking above us."

"Pretty sure she was staring solely at you."

"Whatever. What are we doing next?"

"You can't change the subject that fast."  
"Why is this a big deal?"

"Because in all the time I've known you I've never seen a woman who wasn't Maureen hit on you."

"Just because no woman in New York has hit on me doesn't mean anything."

"Well, your mood quickly changed."

"Excuse me if I don't enjoy getting picked on."

"Excuse me.", said a small female voice standing behind them.

"Told ya she was staring at you."  
"Hi, I'm Mark."

"I'm Zhanna."

"That's a really pretty name."

"Thanks. Do you mind if I take you away from your friends?"

"Well, we're kinda in the middle of my buddy's bachelor party but…"

"Don't worry Mark, it's totally okay."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I won't be offended. Just meet us at the bar by the hotel in two hours."

"Okay. See you guys later."

"Two hours seems pretty generous." Collins said as Mark and Zhanna walked away.

"Mark hasn't gotten laid in a really long time. He needs this."

"You're right. So, where to now?"

"Wanna hit the black jack tables?"

"Hell yes."

"Tonight was great." Mimi said as she stretched out on her bed.

"I can't believe I gave away all my singles."

"Joanne, I'm so proud of you."

"Maureen, please don't hug me when you're drunk."

"Sorry."  
"I wonder if the boys are back yet."

"Yeah, weren't' you supposed to have a heart to heart with Roger?"  
"Yeah. I'll go knock. Keep the door unlocked please."

"No problem."

Mimi returned to announce that the boys still hadn't returned.

"Maybe they're just out having a good time. Don't worry about it."

"Maybe you're right Maureen. But I just can't shake the feeling that something's' wrong."

Just then the girls' phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Mimi."

"Roger? Where are you guys? We thought you'd be back by now."

"Well, we kinda have a problem."

"Okay….what's wrong?"

"We lost Mark."

"You what? How could you possibly loose Mark?"

"Well, he met this girl and Collins and I decided he needed the alone time so we let him go and told him to meet us at this bar. So, we waited for him to show and he never came so now we don't know where he is."

"Okay, um...stay where you are. We'll meet up with you guys to devise a plan."

"Thanks, you're the best."

"I try. And Roger?"

"Yes?"

"If this is some diversion to avoid talking to me I'm going to hurt you."

"Gotcha."

"What happened?" Joanne asked as Mimi hung up the phone.

"Mark is lost."

"Oh my gosh that's horrible."

"We gotta go help the boys track him down."

"Okay, let me put my shoes back on. Come on Maureen we gotta go track down Mark."

"You guys go without me.", Maureen called from the bathroom. "I don't think I can get up."

"That's gross."

"Mimi, be nice. Feel better sweetheart. We'll see you later."

"Let's go. Joanne, you don't think Mark getting lost is foreshadowing of the outcome of my marriage, do you?"

"Honey, don't worry you'll be fine."

"I hope so.", Mimi said as she closed the door and once more ventured out into the wilds of Vegas.

The gang searched for Mark from two in the morning till half past six with no luck.

"We've combed every inch of Vegas. Either he skipped town with that girl or she killed him."

"Roger that's a horrible thing to say!"  
"Sorry, I'm tired and hung over."

"I understand." responded Joanne.

"Maybe he went back to the motel."

"But we hit every spot in this city. How could we have missed him?"

"Mimi's right." said Collins, "it's possible."

"If he went back to that hotel I'm going to kill him."

"I think someone needs a nap."

"Shut up."

"You know, we've been walking around the strip for hours now and not one of us has thought to contact the police." said Joanne.

The entire group stopped in their tracks.

"I feel like such an idiot." Roger said.

"Babe," said Mimi, "I think we all feel like idiots."

"We past he police outpost about five blocks back right?"

"Yes."

"Everybody turn around."

Collins and Joanne led their groaning friends to the Vegas County Police Mini Headquarters.

The gang arrived at the police headquarters to find an empty waiting room accompanied by an empty front desk.

"Well, this is disappointing." Maureen said as her friends walked past her into the building.

"What were you expecting? Criminals lined up all along the wall and police breaking up fights between those convicted?" asked her girlfriend.

"Yes. Don't look at me like that Pookie. This is Vegas! One expects there to be a little action."

"Is there anyone even working here right now?" asked Roger. "They can't all be out fighting crime."

"Is there a bell or something at the front desk that we can ring?"

"Maureen, sweetheart", said Joanne, "this isn't a hotel."

'Is anybody here?" Collins yelled, finally ending the ridiculousness that was ensuing.

Finally, a police officer emerged. He was stocky, short, and looked extremely over-tire4d with either blood or a jelly doughnut stain covering the collar of his shirt.

"Can I help you?" he asked in a voice that could peel paint off the walls.

"Um, yes", said Roger, "my friends and I went out earlier for my fiancée's and my bachelorette and bachelor parties. At my bachelor party we went to one of the shows and afterwards our friend went to spend time with someone else. That was hours ago and he isn't back at the hotel and we have no way of reaching him."

"You have to wait forty-eight hours before filing a missing person's report." said the officer without even looking up from a large pile of paperwork that was sitting in a bin on the front desk.

"Look Officer….."

"Sergeant Peterman."

"Sergeant Peterman", said Joanne, "I'm a lawyer working at legal aid back in New York City and I'm fully aware that forty-eight hours is the time required for filing a missing person's report but can't you make an exception just once? We've spent the remanding portion of our night and a good portion of our morning so far looking for our friend. Could you please just consider taking on our case?"

"Look, lady I know we may not appear that busy to you at the moment but this department has to deal with reprimanding the scum of the earth on a daily and nightly basis. There's no way we could make an exception to look for your friend even if you had substantial evidence that he was kidnapped. Take a form from that pile on the other desk and submit it within the required time and we will add your friend to our missing person's list."

"Sergeant Peterman," said Mimi, "our friend, Mark, was supposed to participate in our wedding. If we wait the allotted time before submitting a report he'll miss the most important day of our lives." she concluded as she out her arm around Roger.

"That's a very touching story doll but I'm an officer of the law. Rules are rules."

Collins made his move to start arguing but there was no use, the officer had made up his mind. The gang walked out of the police station and back to their hotel upset, tired, and worried for Mark's safety.

The group settled in to their respective hotel rooms. As Roger and Collins finally started to fall asleep they heard a knock at their door.

"If you're housekeeping please come back in two hours at least", screamed Collins through his pillow.

"Open up, now!"

"He's back!" exclaimed Roger as he leaped up as Mark continued to bang furiously on the door.

"What happened to you?" said roger as he opened the door on a severely disheveled Mark.

"I managed to record some of it."

"You took your camera?" said Collins as he rose to great his friend.

"You're surprised?" asked Roger.

"Good point."

"We looked for you for hours!" said Roger as Mark began to set up his explanation.

"I'm sorry. I tried to get away but that girl…."

"Mark, you okay?"

"Yeah, sorry. Still in shock."

"That bad or that good?"

"Unexplainable."

"And you recorded this?" asked Roger

"Only the first time."

"You did it more than once?" asked Collins

"She made me.", Mark responded as he finally finished setting up his camera and projector.

"Gentleman, I give you my night."

"Wait, why are you leaving again?" asked Collins

"If I stay I might start crying. I'll be in the lounge recovering with a scotch and soda."

Roger and Collins were left to watch the visual recap of Mark's outing. Less than a minute in and the guys could not believe what they were seeing.

"This is like really good porn." said Roger

"No, this is better than porn." responded Collins. "I didn't even know the human body could bend that way."

"Apparently it can. And this is what traumatized him?"

"No, I think that move right there is what traumatized him."

"Yeah, that's brutal. Dancers are crazy, man."

"This is why I will never date one."

"Amen, brother."

The boys continued to watch Mark's bizarre antics until they felt just as horrified as their poor, sexed-out friend.

Later that day, after Mark announced his presence to the girls and everyone got an adequate amount of sleep the group decided to have a pseudo-rehearsal dinner (pseudo mainly because no actual rehearsal was taking place).

"I feel so out of place in this restaurant." said Maureen as she shuffled around in her chair.

"Well, dear if you hadn't worn your ripped jean shorts as I distinctly remember telling you not to maybe you wouldn't feel that way.", replied Joanne.

"Stop trying to change me!"

"I'm not trying to change you! I just don't want you to embarrass yourself!"

"Sounds similar to me."

"I was looking out for you!"

"Girls, fighting in a fancy restaurant is even worse than wearing ripped jean shorts. So can we please save the bickering for another time?"

"Yes, Collins." responded the girls in unison.

"Thank you. Mark you may precede with your toast."

"Thanks, Collins. As I was about to say I've known Roger for a long time. Longer than he'd like to acknowledge. And because of this I know almost everything there is to know about this man. But even my vast amount of Roger related knowledge could not compete with that of Mimi Marquez. Not only do the two of you know so much about each other but you both saved each other. Roger was as close to emotionally dead as a person can get and you made him come alive again. Mimi seemed to be thoroughly enjoying her life but she couldn't severe ties with her past. You gave her reason to. Marriage really isn't necessary for a couple like you. Over the past year you've already experienced enough joy, pain, romance, and sadness to fill two average marriages. But I know that this isn't about finally getting the chance to spend your lives together. It's a chance to celebrate the culmination of a truly remarkable romance. Whether you end up dissolving this marriage or see it through I know that you'll be satisfied because you did it together. To Mimi and Roger, may they continue to love each other and be committed to each other with a hundred percent dedication."

"Here, here."

"Mark, I'm touched", exclaimed Mimi as she gave her fiancée's best man a hug.

"What can I say; I have a way with words."

"Don't gloat. It's not flattering on you." responded Roger

"Thanks."

"I'm kidding. That was a really great toast. Thanks."

The gang continued on with their dinner and desert but Mimi and Roger could barely eat. They just kept staring into each other's eyes, eagerly anticipating what the next day would bring.


End file.
